I'm overwhelmed.

The past six months of my life have been overwhelming to say the least. I graduated from college and then went on a worldly adventure. Upon arriving home, I left my family and friends to set out on another adventure to travel for a year with the African Children’s Choir. Since arriving back in the States I have been looking for a word to describe this feeling that was deep down in the depths of my soul. The word I eventually stumbled upon was… Overwhelmed.

You may ask yourself, how or why I could ever be overwhelmed? It seems like I have my life together and sorted out very well. Which is true, but only partially true. You see, I am nowhere near perfect and still have a lot of growing to do.

I’m overwhelmed with the fact that I am entering adulthood (Like the actual real thing. The kind where you have to pay your own bills and the idea of moving out of your parent’s house is also a real thing). It feels like just yesterday that I was just a kid and causing trouble in the neighborhood. Now I’m making decisions that will impact and affect me now and later on in life. I have a legitimate degree that will allow me to educate children and fulfill a life long childhood dream. It is no longer my parents looking after me, but instead me learning how to take the ropes in my life decisions.

I’m overwhelmed with the people that I’ve met and that I continue to meet. I have crossed paths with so many awesome and fabulous people. I’ve met new best friends, secret lovers (I wish! I’m only kidding), soul mates and mentors. I am amazed by each person’s kind and humble spirit. I’m also overwhelmed with knowing that it will be harder to see and keep in contact with my friends from college due to all of us going off in different (and awesome) directions.

I’m overwhelmed with the experiences that I’ve had and will be blessed with in this next year. I have no idea what is in store for me this year or when I eventually make it back to Illinois next July. And that is intimidating.

I have a sense of peace in the craziness. I know that the overwhelming feeling is something that is for good due to all the things mentioned above being positive. So from this point I take each day step by step, with a huge smile on my face and a lot of love in my heart. It’s cool knowing that the big man upstairs has got it all figured out. I’m pretty sure he’s gonna make this next adventure one heck of a time. And instead of that being overwhelming, it’s rather exciting.

“I delight myself in You,

Captivated by Your beauty.

I’m overwhelmed, I’m overwhelmed by You.”